Love and Death se fueron al campo un día

I write from a place bare of this armor that I've built since the experience that many call "someone breaking your heart." Well I don't call it...i am a little more dramatic than that day it happened where I knew this our love our partnership our relationship can not exist in the same space or shared conversation....i wanted to die. My happiness was linked to our life together so knowing that it ended left me stranded in the middle of the intersection of love, codependency and death. What you do?

Last Saturday I was mugged on my neighborhood, Santurce. My childhood backyard where I roller bladed, took the bus anyware and felt in love. Here I am walking listenning to funky disco music and smiling cause the day is beautiful and is shining with people on the streets. It was a side walk located in the Ponce de León Avenue between Bolivar and Fuerte Street. A man (around my age) walks towards me as I lift my sight from my phone(i was about to text a friend to meet in a few minutes) he lifts up his shirt and there is a gun in his pants(not in a sexual sense) and he starts talking to me and I take out one of my earpiece from my headphones and say: "What? I couldn't hear you". He says: "Dame el teléfono y sigue caminando"(give me your phone and continue walking). I gave him the phone and started running as fast as I can....running for what I felt was my life.

Here! what I've been thinking for the past week about the experience. The last time I felt someone had my life in their hands was my last "big love". The feeling was the same...someone had power over me. I couldn't do anything. I understand they are two different experiences and that I need to not complain cause it could be worst. My heart dropped my soul was shaken and its been vibrating with this fear in my body. I think that even if you don't want to be vulnerable with those you love someone will remind you that your emotions are living inside you and that just be you and let others see your love flourish and share with them and with many.

Today I love you more!